Another "Never"

Ok, here is another thing that I hope to never, ever do as a mother:

-Write in the "voice" of my child. For example... I brought a present to a one year old's birthday party, and got a thank you note like this:

"Thank you oh so much for my widdle cuddly blanket. I really wuv it alot. Thanks for helping me celebrate my very first birfday! Kisses and cuddles, Paul, age 1."

Now, unless your kid is a freaking genius, Im not buying it. Usually they potty-train before they start writing in script. Here is how a thank-you note from me might read:

"Thanks for humoring us by giving up two hours of your Saturday afternoon and coming to our son's birthday party. Im sure he would thank you himself if he could, or if he knew you had been there. I will show him pictures when he is older. Thanks also for the great train set! Im sure it will keep him entertained for at least fifteen minutes at a time, (which is HUGE.)

Sincerely, ChicChickadee, Hot Husband, and Biscuit.

PS. Im very sorry about that cake-throwing incident. Please send us the drycleaning bill."